She’s lump. She’s lump. She’s in my head.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

The past week had been crazy. A series of medical tests here and
there… including a two-and-a-half-hour-long MRI scan at ChongHua
Hospital. You have no idea what it was like…for a claustrophobic me.
Notwithstanding the actual cost paid for the service, the memory of it
all was pricele$$! First off, my mom’s unrelenting anxiety over what
could be causing my leg lumps. Back in 2004, I had a single lump down
my right shin for some bizarre unknown cause. It hurt so I had to see
an ortho, Dr. Jimmynette Gatchalian, to have it checked then and took
an x-ray to make sure it wasn’t any bone problem. He diagnosed it as a
simple BIG ugly swollen bruise and it will just go away after I put hot
compress twice a day. Knowing that it will simply disappear, I never
really paid attention to it. Until now.

I’ve noticed in the recent months that the lumps were starting to
spread all over my right shin. Up to 4 major lumps that weren’t really
flaming red but they hurt when pressed or even when touched slightly.
Then a few weeks ago, I noticed three more lumps on my left shin. I
hadn’t been wrestling or whatever so I couldn’t think of any reason why
I’m developing these cyst-like soft tissue masses. I’m ok with them
because they’re barely noticeable except that when it’s felt, it aches.

Then I went home to Ormoc to see Dr. Gatchalian. I had an x-ray and
a number of blood tests to check what’s wrong. The results were normal.
I’m okay! But the doctor had this niggling look on his face that caused
my mom’s anxiety to knock on Heaven’s door or something. He did refer
me to a doctor in Cebu for further tests. My mother was concerned with
the blood results since the RDW was way over the normal range and the
PDW was quite low. I browsed through the net and read that it was like
an onset of iron-deficiency anemia or something like I need folic acid
or so. Whatever.

We didn’t see the doctor that was referred because I also have a
cousin who is a bone-doctor (an orthopedist?), Dr. Rhoel Dejaño and is
Cebu-based. He suspected my lumps to be shin splints. No, I never had
Osgood-Schlatter Disease when I was younger. But he said, I should just
get an MRI scan like Dr. Gatchalian advised just to have a peace of
mind. So off we went to the hospital for the scan. And the real story
begins.

I thought it would last for jut 15 minutes max but when I asked the
attendant just before I entered the MRI room, I was informed that it
could last up to an hour! Holy $#%@! As if I had a choice, we already
paid [and it was a matter of life and death]. Heck, I’m too young to
have cancer! It was around half past 1PM and I had to take off every
metallic object on my body… which is quite a number. I was even lying
down on this bed-like part of the machine when I remembered to take off
my navel ring and one more earring on the upper part of my left ear.
The soft cushion on my back was wrapped in leatherette and I had a
blanket over me because the room was unconditionally cold. They started
to run the machine and I was there motionless. When they moved me right
under the machine I was claustrophobic all of a sudden. When the
attendant left me, I was sure I was going to die because it was like
the War of the Worlds thing over me. I thought the machine was going to
swallow me and press me until my guts spill out of my eyes, mouth and
ears. Eeeekk! It was the worst two hours or so of my life. They
wouldn’t let me move but did so anyways because my leg hurt from the
immobility. The scan lasted more than it was supposed to because I kept
budging. The annoyingly white room added to the whole drama of my
claustrophobia with its humongous metal door. They should have placed
me in a purple room with butterfly prints all over the wall. Yeah.
Whenever I feel the world close in on me, I stare at the huge red
digital timer on the side of the machine to keep myself together. In
spite of my abhorrence for figures, I never thought numbers could save
me or keep me sane at the very least. The War of the Worlds moment was
finally over. They let me out at almost 4PM.

The
results had to be obtained the following day and so we headed home
because my parents needed to get ready for the Lettermen concert at the
Waterfront Hotel in Lahug. I ended up at the IT park, drinking
Raspberry Iced Tea at Bo’s Coffee with Kitty, Manoy Mark and his law
school buddies after dinner.

The next day we had to go to my father’s doctor first. He had his
diabetes tests at Hi-Precision then off to Dr. Gerry Tan’s clinic at
Cebu Doctor’s Hospital. His health is a-okay, thank goodness! With two
injections of insulin each day, blood sugar tests three times a week,
with very limited food intake… Shish! I’ll be damned! My dad’s the
greatest! He’s my hero! And he just won during their last Golf
tournament. He showed me his trophy and I’m soooo proud!

Now on to my results. Rhoel told me I was fine. Very good! No cysts,
no cancer. Meaning, they won’t need to do a biopsy and cut my leg!
Hurrah! Praise the Lord Jesus Christ! BUT… it’s confirmed to be shin
splints. I have to go through rehab. My therapy is scheduled three
times a week, an hour or so each session. I have to do it diligently
until the pain and the horrible lumps go away. I have painkillers, too.
I was thinking of taking an indefinite leave from work so I can have
enough rest and therapy ASAP. Also, I need to go back to school for 6
months… but I’ll blog about this one some other time.

(¯`·.¸¸.-> (",) «¤° You are my twisted sunshine °¤» (",) <-.¸¸.·´¯)

Three years ago my journey began
Chasin down this cure… no plan in hand
Just your pulse, my reason guiding the dark
Just no wind with conviction from the start.
The moment your eyes made an introduction
I felt my second violent breath of life
Flawless to the point of being godly
Yet I fell all for your imperfections.

Now its slightly weathered, its slightly worn
Our hands still together until after the storm
I still believe in ever after with you
Cause life is a pleasure with you by my side
And there ain’t no current in this river we can’t ride
I still believe in ever after with you.

Nothing compares to the good times
Feels like were floating when the rest of them climb
You made me believe in love and not the perfect kind
A real messy beautiful, twisted sunshine…
Emotions: volcanic eruptions
We both took care so were still alive
Tunnel vision . . . determination
I want you, I want to make it right.

Now its slightly weathered its slightly worn
Our hands still together until after the storm
I still believe in ever after with you
Cause life is a pleasure with you by my side
And there aint no current in this river we cant ride
I still believe in ever after with you.

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2 comments

  1. WAWA man c maimai oiee…

    o, nibasa jud ku ha?

    ikaw, kalimut nman kah nku…

    resign nlng ku as uR shrink oist.PO

    ReplyDelete
  2. i love reading ur blog! it’s like this book where every page is as exciting as the last one.

    ReplyDelete

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